Foot prints of the past.

I am home.  Northwest Indiana.  Crown Point to be exact.

I am staying with my brother Will.  He and I have always been the closest siblings.. due to age and circumstance.. we just connect deeply.   He lives in a house that used to be my Mama's. (pronounced mi-maaw)  It is different now.   Remodeled...changed, but yet the same.

Today as I walked down the sidewalk, I looked down at my bear feet....  In a flash I was 10.  Running on rocks with no shoes on my feet.. Barely touching the ground.  Making my way up to the flower filled yard.  The sidewalk lined with daffodils..  Smelling the biscuits and gravy of Saturday morning.  Knowing that she made cookies last night... expecting the smell of mylanta and vicks that engulfed me in the mornings hug and "mornin' Donna Jane".   "How is baby girl today.. givin' your momma trouble?".      Mama knew I didn't give my mom trouble.. but always checked.  After a prodding to go wash hands, a quiz of what the news was from the house.  Where is Will and how long til he got there... (Will was a notorious dawdler.. took twice as long as me to get there, to eat, to fall asleep, to ride a bike). There was prayer, breakfast and OUR TIME.

We had just a few minutes, just her and I...  but I got to listen, and she got to talk.  She sang, :  "In the Garden, Victory in Jesus... talked about Pa Smith, so long gone I could not remember him, but still so there in her mind.   His leather chair still sitting in the front room.  His pipe still on the mantle.  Those memorials that stand to keep him always close.  She told of the plants that filled the house and how much each had grown.  The aches that told of the expected weather.  Then the announcement that her nose itched, Will would be there soon.

I flashed to that time.  I remembered the feeling of childhood.  The comfort of home. The spirit of God.  The Love of my Mama!  The COOKIE JAR!

I looked down at my feet again.   Now not able to stand for long on the rocky drive.  No more able to run like the wind, but somehow today, now, a little more agile.   I slip off into the grass... and before I know it - a cartwheel.  Haven't done that in 15 years!...  but boy it felt great!    The grass in my feet then hands then feet then hands, then FEET!  Exhilaration!

I BREATHE IN JOY but.. there is something sad... It all seems to have shrunk. ...  It used to seem a mile to mama's house.  now just a quick walk... the hill that made you FLY down it on a skate board, bike or roller skates (with a key - oh yes the metal ones...) was just a low grade slope...    It is all perspective.  Things that seemed so big to me as a child are in truth of today's perspective, quite small.   Likewise, the things that seem so important to me now, as a grown up, have just become not that important.  Here in the place where my view of life started.  Here, at home.  Walking in my own footprints of the past.